Melbourne International Comedy Festival
MICF – Elysia Hall – How Good are Dicks
Wednesday 28th March, Thursday 29th March, Tuesday 3rd April, Wednesday 4th April, Thursday 6th April: all 9.30pm-11pm
Saturday 31st March & Saturday 7th April: both 5pm-6.30pm
‘Mmm yeh dicks! So bloody good. I actually cry when I think about them because they make me so happy. Dicks are my espresso martini, my Shania Twain, my Quran, you know, they’re sacred and I worship them’, said the extremely closeted lesbian.
It was a performance of a lifetime that had audiences pining for more. The Herald Sun called it ‘a compelling and brave performance’.
The bloke Elysia shagged on schoolies whose name or respect she never caught said, ‘She must have gone to NIDA, the orgasms seemed so real’.
Elysia’s mum and dad called it ‘A knockout performance… we thought Brooke from tennis camp was just a friend’.
How Good are Dicks is an absurd but true tale of a northern beaches girl lying to the world and her vagina about her sexuality. One psycho bitch, one stage, one path to puss.